Ghoulies (1985)

Back in 1985, the famous poster scared kids away from toilets. The movie itself isn’t likely to scare anybody, but it is some prime 80s junk that helped rot the minds of the young (myself enthusiastically included) in its day. C-3PO’s cereal doesn’t exist anymore, but we still have Ghoulies and it’s still completely idiotic and still entertaining. It stars everybody’s favorite movie victims: a group of young college mongoloids having a party. Some of them seem okay, some of them are obnoxious twatfucks. There isn’t a single one of them whom we wouldn’t mind seeing having their night ruined by one-foot-tall killer monsters from another dimension. That’s what happens here. Throw in Jack Nance in a supporting role (he’s sort of the film’s freaky Dwight Frye) and I’m all in. Someone pass me another beer, please?