Haunted-Ween (1991)

What’s an independent filmmaker supposed to do with his low-budget Halloween horror flick when all of the GOOD Halloween movie titles are already taken?

Me, I wouldn’t suggest calling the movie Haunted-Ween, but one-film-wonder director, and pride of Bowling Green, Kentucky, Doug Robertson thought differently. He’s right, too. The title is a perfect fit for this film’s high camp. The only thing Robertson takes seriously here is that his killer’s victims always scream good and loud when they get sliced. The rest of the movie is Goofball City, up to and including the scene where someone makes a car instantly explode simply by unloading a shotgun at the back bumper. This is all about what happens when a bunch of frat guys put together a Halloween haunted house only to have a real psycho killer sneak his way in and chop everyone down to kibbles ‘n’ bits. The twist here is that the crowd thinks that the carnage is merely a part of the show, so they cheer it on. Some of the frights here: death by razor, decapitation by baseball bat, the ever-popular accidental impalement, chainsaw to the neck and—scariest of all—the world’s fakest hillbilly accent that one actor puts on for the entire movie.

When Robertson made this, he only wanted one thing: To get a movie out and onto video store shelves. That was it. Robertson claims to not even LIKE horror movies, but a slasher flick with couple gallons of blood and a few breasts seemed like the best way to reach his goal. He succeeded and over twenty years later the film lives on as a minor cult item for its sense of humor and handmade charm. It goes good with a late night hour and enough drinks to wear down your critical faculties.